Metal Fans Unlikely To Cheat, Jazz Fans Are Boning Everyone According To A Study

Jazz fans may want to keep whatever’s in their pants in check — according to a recent survey by affair website Victoria Milan, lovers of jazz are almost 10 times more likely to cheat than heavy metal fans.

The study (published by The Sun), which queried more than 6,500 people who admitted to affairs, also found that three-quarters of unfaithful men and women say they can’t stop thinking about their lover when hearing their favorite music.

Jazz topped the list of “seductive” genres, followed by salsa and pop, which were most likely to send respondents into sexual fantasy mode. All I’m hearing is “nobody wants to fuck to metal,” which is simply not true. Other genres ranked as follows in order of cheaters’ preference:

1. Jazz: 19%
2. Salsa: 14%
3. Pop: 13%
4. Country: 12%
5. Rap: 9%
6. Classical: 8%
7. Blues: 6%
8. Reggae: 5%
9. Rock and Roll: 5%
10. Electronica: 4%
11. Indie: 3%
12. Heavy Metal: 2%

Sigurd Vedal, boss of Victoria Milan, noted that music’s emotive power and ability to conjure memories play a major role in these temptations. “As long-term relationships progress, the excitement and passion slowly dies out and people start to look for that missing element outside their relationship,” he explained.

Vedal added that music often enhances intimate moments: “The song you listen to on your way to meet your lover, or the music playing while you’re intimate, becomes much more touching than the music you walked down the aisle to 10 years ago.”

Is this all probably an ad for Victoria Milan? Probably. Is it funny and make metal fans look good? Also yes, and that’s what’s most important here.